Asalaam Alykum Yabna Rasulallah (saws),
May Allah (swt)'s peace and blessing be upon you and your great and immaculate family.
I pray that you are in peace and comfort wherever you are.
I pray that you return to us soon, as our longing and need for you becomes great, to the point where it is unbearable.
You are like the sun behind the clouds for us, that we may benefit from you,
But sometimes our love for this world is so great that we neglect the sun and go and sit inside a cave,
Playing with sticks and rocks until we can make a fire or some sort of light.
Little do we know what great rays of sun are outside and waiting for us, warm and bright, they are welcoming.
You are these rays of light, yet we sit in our cave, crying and whimpering, wondering why we have been made such a pathetic and ill existence.
Perhaps we have fear that if we leave this cave, we will be eaten alive by some sort of beast.
Nay, the beast is this fear itself.
Ya Sahib Al-Zaman, Ya Hujjatallah, Ya Mahdi,
I am this pathetic and foolish person sitting in this cave.
I neglect all of my duties to Allah (swt) and fail miserably in following the footsteps of you and your perfect family.
I know that if I follow these footsteps, I will have a great and honorable existence.
But I sit in my cave, playing with my sticks and rocks, wondering why has Allah (swt) abandoned me?!
Why is it so hard for me to get up and move towards you?!
I look out and see the bright rays of light, but fail to move.
Because of laziness?
Because of foolishness?
Satan is sitting on my head, remote control in his hand, my heart in his heart.
I seek your assistance, by the Grace of Allah (swt) you assist me in my life.
I want to move closer to you.
I want to be amongst your honorable and humbled Shia, who will not be like those that butchered your grandfather Hussein (as).
Those Kufans who claimed they loved and supported him turned their backs on him in such an instance that someone would not even abandon an animal.
Am I among these Kufans? May Allah(swt)'s curse be forever and ever upon them and those that assisted them.
I feel that I am one of them, oh my Imam.
So many people neglected their Imam, your great grandfathers, may Allah(swt)'s blessing be upon them all.
I feel I have neglected you also.
I have so much love for this world that I never believed I had.
I always thought this is something I am no where near, but when I examine my heart, it is so far from Allah (swt) and so close to this dunya that it makes me sick.
I have been told that you receive information about your Shia, if I am even worthy enough to be called such a word.
I know that you are aware of my situation.
Ya Imam, please help me.
Al-Ajjal Al-Ajjal Ya Sahib Al-Zaman